Natural England dress code guidance

Matthew Chatfield
Latest posts by Matthew Chatfield (see all)

A contact within Natural England sends The Ranger the following snippit which has been circulating on their internal email:

Natural England dress code guidance As part of our effort to achieve a strong and visible new identity for Natural England it has been decided that staff at all levels below the Executive Board will be issued with new NE uniforms to be worn at the office, and while attending meetings or other functions in a representative capacity. The uniforms will be durable and practical, and careful consideration has gone into their design. In order to facilitate transition to the new NE personnel structure uniforms will be colour coded according to tier. Based on the three primary colours the following scheme will be adopted. Leader Group (Team Leaders, Project Leaders, and Major Project Leaders ) ” Mustard yellow Specialist Group (Principal and Senior Specialists) ” Light blue Team Members (Everyone else) ” Scarlet An additional corporate stylistic change has been agreed on advice from experts in the field of branding. The original NE logo has been deemed too indistinctive for an important new organisation needing to establish its credibility among a wide range of partner organisations and opinion formers. The breeze block design has, therefore, been dropped. Instead a more natural looking arrow shape based on the leaf of Hedge Bindweed Calystegia sepium has been chosen. The exact design has yet to be agreed but it is likely to incorporate a superimposed ring element to symbolise the unification of the three founding bodies. The new logo will appear on the uniform of NE staff. Photos of the new uniform in its three colour variants bearing “working draft” versions of the logo are shown on the following page. We hope you will enjoy wearing them and agree that they reflect the culture of Natural England effectively.

If you are wondering what on earth all this is about, or you have not yet spotted that this is a clever joke, the photos supplied make everything clear. Sadly, for copyright reasons we can’t bring you the images in question. But here is one that might give you the idea:

Star Trek uniforms

Breezeblock, eh? Whatever next? And has nobody told them what happens to redshirts?

Matthew Chatfield

Uncooperative crusty. Unofficial Isle of Wight cultural ambassador. Conservation, countryside and the environment, with extra stuff about spiders.

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